February 6, 2009

Diane Feinstein Reserves Right to Vote against Stimulus

Great idea Barney.

Barney "don't blame me for Freddie and Fannie" Frank thinks we should limit all business pay across the country to $500,000.

Great idea.

I suggest we start with the entertainment and sports industries. (Oprah first)

Once we are done there we seriously need to curb excessive speaking fees. Seriously, is anyone worth the kind of money per hour that Bill Clinton gets for speaking?

I'm outraged.

Outraged I tell you!

Racine Mayoral Race Update

I got a call from Alderman Kaplan this morning.

He informed me that he is withdrawing his name from consideration for the Mayor's race. He said, "There is too much work left for me to do in the 4th, I want to concentrate on that."

Tragic.

598,000 jobs lost in in January.

That's tragic, but only .001196 of what Nancy Pelosi is claiming.

February 5, 2009

Robert Gibbs Avoids Jake Tapper's Questions On Transparency

Jake Tapper, actual journalist.

Another day...

Another Obama tax cheat.

Can you say, "Married, filing jointly."

Sure, I thought you could.

A Letter from the US Economy

Dear US Populace,

Though in the past I have never directly addressed you, preferring to act either via unseen methods (the so-called "invisible hands") or through sweater-clad proxies, I am taking the exceptional step of speaking directly to you, the US taxpayer, during this time of our joint crisis.

I have taken this drastic measure because more and more of you are being misled by charlatans, fools, and gun-toting religious nuts who want you to believe that I will receive little or no benefit from the stimulus package that is currently passing through congress.

I can assure you that nothing could be further from the truth, and I shall be stimulated more thoroughly than a Viagra-addled Urkel giving massages at the Playboy grotto.

Perhaps you live in a fairy-tale world where crucifixes just dunk themselves into vats of rhino urine, or where bicycle paths spontaneously carve themselves in areas where they are patently infeasible and unnecessary, but here in the real world it takes tax money forcibly removed from your pocket to provide these valuable social services to the chronically unskilled and underemployed.

During your morning commute on the Interstate, where you see a large empty expanse of terrain beside the road, I see a place where an ultra-modern, high-cost light rail system could endlessly shuttle half-empty trains back and forth in an eternal procession of protected union jobs and hopelessly outdated railworker benefits packages, all taking people from a place they don't live near to another place they don't want to go.

Assuming, of course, that no tit mice or red-crested dungbombers would be disturbed by the installation of such a rail system, in which case it will have to be rerouted through a residential area.

I have read several economic "columnists" claim that there are legitimate concerns, but I can assure you that they are invalid. Even now sociology and performing-arts majors are flooding the rolls of the unemployed; don't they deserve a chance to be hired by a poorly-run construction outfit owned by political cronies of the ruling party so that they, too, can have the life experience of constructing shoddy high-density housing that will crumble into disuse within the next 3 to 5 years?

To those of you who still feel that my stimulus is less important than your paltry tax dollars, which you will doubtless squander selfishly thinking only of yourselves, remember that when I am angry my wrath is terrible to behold. If you think that my boundless rage will be slaked by closing thousands of Starbucks and brutalizing the journalism industry, you are fooling yourself.

Inefficient car manufacturers are only the beginning. Unless I get my stimulation, I may turn my attention to other trillion-dollar operations that are poorly run.

Like your government.

Fear....

Go ahead scare people into your ridiculous bill.

Who knew?!?

Etta says nyet!!

She goes on to say:
[ "You guys know your president, right? You know the one with the big ears? Wait a minute, he ain't my president, he might be yours, he ain't my president." ]
I'm sorry but I take special pleasure in hearing this from Etta.
The song happens to be (one of) Mrs. sU and mine's songs. I was sickened when I heard B-KNO sing it to BO.

Audio HERE.

Not bad work.

If you can get it...

Nah, there is nothing to cut.

February 4, 2009

Ok, now it is news...

The Racine Journal Times is digging into the legal past of everyone who has declared their candidacy for Mayor.

That sounds like something the newspaper should do.

I just have one question.

If legal issues are important now; how come the paper didn't care about the pending legal case involving Marge Krupp when she was running for Congress? (they never mentioned it)

I think the (D) after her name helped.

Classic...

This from the Racine Journal Times in regards to new Racine Mayoral candidate Austin Rodriguez...

Many of the candidates have been involved in local politics for years, but Rodriguez is new to the scene.

He filed his candidacy papers last week and he is going to see how everything works out.

If he was elected, he would want to concentrate on the city’s “green reputation,” keeping the city’s rivers and lakes clean. He also wants to fix roads, lower taxes, promote commuter transit and encourage businesses to have co-ops.

He sells cell phones at Regency Mall and lives with his parents, he said.

According to online court records, in 2005 he was found guilty of disorderly conduct and in 2004 he was found guilty of retail theft. He was also found guilty in 2006 of operating a vehicle with a suspended license. He said most of the charges took place while he was in high school and he has changed.“In my past I’ve done my damage. Right now I want to prove myself,” Rodriguez said.

“It’s my way of giving back.”

Dude, I'd like to know how you are going to lower taxes and promote commuter transit. If commuter transit is code for KRM, that money sucker will never allow us to lower taxes.

Better hang onto that gig at the mall.

Caledonia to the people....

We don't really care about your opinion....

Lisa has the details.

February 3, 2009

February 2, 2009

MRQ Living Well Is The Best Revenge

Is there a vaccine? Lance.

More money equals better scores. Roland.

I reference my butt. Jimi.

$10 for 3 balls. Kate.

Probably at work. Kate.

Living Well Is The Best Revenge Chris.

just being a jerk. Owen.

Chief Embezzlement Officer Orbs.

GIMMIE IT, IT’S MINE! Kevin.

Bacon pron. Iron Matron.

So poetic. James T.

Cure sobriety. Casper.

you're a punk. Jones.

TOKIN’ that bad boy. TAB.

kicked out of his office pool Egg.

TRQ

ready to blow Chad.

Animals taste best when someone else kills them Chris.

wheezing the juice Jones.

Paying taxes optional Wigdy.

How can Republicans still be the villains when they control absolutely nothing? Michael. (You really need to ask that?)

If you want pseudo-poetry, talk to the muppet. Darth.

Are you incrementing something? Nick.

Waaaah-shington Scoff.

Pain pills. STAT! Patrick.

Super Bowl Commercials Sucked Open Thread

Discuss

Nutburger,

See Jonathon Porritt.

Some much for choice.

Happy Groundhogs Day.

Punxsutawney Phil sees shadow; winter to continue

I blame global warming.